How many times have you caught yourself saying yes, even when every part of you wanted to say no? Listen to our Episode 3 of Leadership Unlocked to learn about the power of saying no.

It seems simple enough: decline the extra task, push back on the unrealistic deadline, or step aside from a project that isn’t yours. But in reality, saying no can feel terrifying. We worry about letting others down, damaging relationships, or being seen as “not a team player.”

And so, we say yes.

But here’s the problem: when you say yes to everything, you’re also saying no to something else. Your wellbeing. The quality of your work. The growth opportunities for your team.

Why we struggle to say no

For many leaders, especially emerging ones, saying yes feels like the fastest way to prove yourself. You want to be seen as dependable, approachable, and capable. But over time, those yeses pile up. What started as an opportunity to impress can quickly turn into overwhelm, burnout, or frustration.

There’s also the emotional side. Saying no can feel awkward. We don’t want to disappoint people, create conflict, or risk being seen differently by our peers or leaders. So we smooth over the discomfort with a yes, and carry the weight ourselves.

The hidden cost of yes

Here’s what often gets missed: every time a leader says yes to something, they’re also saying no to their team.

Think about it. When you pick up a task because “it’ll be quicker if I just do it,” you rob someone else of the chance to learn and grow. You send the signal that leadership is about doing everything yourself rather than creating space for others to step in. Over time, that erodes confidence, capability, and trust within your team.

Saying yes also chips away at your energy. The more you take on, the greater the risk of resentment—towards your work, your leader, or even your team.

Check out our episode Stepping Back to Move Forward to uncover some strategies to help you know when to pause, give direction, and step in with purpose so that you can empower your team, build accountability, and create permanent impact.

The power of saying no

The truth is, saying no isn’t about shutting people down. It’s about creating clarity for yourself, for your role, and for your team.

Here are some ways to start:

• Check your why: Before defaulting to yes, pause. Why are you leaning towards that answer? Is it fear of conflict, a desire to please, or a genuine fit with your role?
• Get clear on your role: The stronger your understanding of what you’re here to deliver as a leader, the easier it becomes to make decisions about what to take on and what to push back on.
• Practise small nos: Start with safe spaces such as a friend, a team member you trust, or even at home with your family. Practising helps you build confidence in using no without guilt.
• Be brave and explain: A simple no with a clear reason can be more powerful (and respected) than you think. Most of the time, people will accept it and move on.
• Use curiosity: If a request doesn’t feel right, ask questions: Does this need to be done this way? What’s the real priority here? Curiosity often uncovers alternative solutions.

Shifting the mindset

A final thought: no doesn’t have to be the end of a conversation. In fact, it shouldn’t be. Saying no can open the door to more honest and productive discussions. When someone says no, it’s an invitation to explore why, to understand capacity, and to find the best way forward together.

And if you’re a leader, remember that modelling healthy boundaries gives your team permission to do the same. It creates a culture where success is defined not by busyness, but by focus, balance, and meaningful results.

So the next time you’re asked to take on something new, pause. Consider the trade-off. And remember that every yes comes at a cost.

Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do—for yourself, your team, and your organisation—is to simply, and courageously, say no.